Self,

Here we are

Party of one

What do you want to think about?

Penance

Knew you were gonna say that

Anything but the elections

I mean, penance is a light topic, why not? lol

You’d think by coming out and saying you voted Trump qualified you as a man. Not the Trump part, just the balls to say you voted for him. You know, taking a stand, defending your position, that whole “manly”. Instead I’m “fragile.” “Angry.”

Wait a sec, you just said–

No more elections. Deal

. . .

Dude, what about that Hindu homie at the Shell station?

Trip, ain’t he?

DJ’n out to that cool-ass Indian music

He really wants me to try that honey stuff. Maybe next time. Those pills are messin’ with the stomach

It’s what I like about you

You mean you?

Whatever

What’s that, Me, tell me what you like

You, we, me–just don’t give a shit

How’s that for “angry”

You keep bringing that up

‘Cause it keeps getting brought up

But are you?

What?

Angry?

Oh Jeezus, here we go

. . .

That’s supposed to come from someone a lot cuter than you

I’m your feminine side, remember?

Fine. Of course I’m angry. Shit, I’m 55. If I’m not angry at something it’s a pretty unlived life

You know what I mean

I do know what you mean and you know as well as I do the answer is no. I’m happy. I’m depressed. I spend time every day in gratitude. I don’t think angry people take the time to do that. I don’t think they look as as good as I do, either, or–

Did you just accuse yourself of being good looking?

Maybe. I might’ve. Someone has to

. . .

Why do you think homie at the Shell lights up when we walk in, don’t he? Does the boomsy boomsy signal with his hands. Tosses us our woody pill. Yessir, he says

Yessir!

Next thing you know we’re dancing on both sides of the counter. That sound “angry” to you?

I get it, I get it. You don’t have to convince me

. . .

Penance

Right

It’s bad what happened. Our part in all of it

Should we tell ’em

No, let’s take it to our grave

But it is Things Men Carry

Yeah, well, let’s carry this to our grave, then.

. . .

How much longer you think?

I don’t know, it was bad so maybe a long time. Maybe the rest of our lives

Sucks

It’s supposed to, it’s why they call it penance

He’s been with us this whole time, though?

For the millionth fuckin’ time, yes, He has

. . .

Hurts something sweet. Like He’s taking the time out of His busy day to punish us but isn’t that kind of like tough love?

I wish I could really believe that

I know you do. It’s why I have to do it for the both of us

Can’t we just go to confession and —

Nah, not for these ones

What about–

They don’t know any better

“They,” hunh? I see what you did there. Well played, Sir

. . .

It’s like half our fault

It is, but you remember what was said at that Catholic Men’s conference

Yeah, I know what you’re gonna say

It’s not our job to only get ourselves into Heaven–

We gotta get them there, too

We gotta get them there, too, exactly

Yeah, but it’s like Christmas time coming up and —

Only Fans

What

Only Fans. We’ll start an Only Fans

Dude, fuck off

Lol

. . .

It sucks being us right now

I know. We just gotta just keep our eyes peeled for His grace. He’s still there

. . .

We’ll know when it’s over?

We’ll know when it’s over

Hope you’re right

. . .

Me too.